STP 161 | Just Get It to Exist: Launching the Mission in You with Evan Marbury
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[00:00:00]
[00:00:03] James Marland: if someone has cancer you have to learn how to live with cancer. You have to learn how to live with chronic illness. You have to learn to live with the reality of brokenness and struggle. But that doesn't mean it gets to dictate. How we live that we don't make our decisions for that struggle and for that pain.
[00:00:20] We, we live with it as coming with us. But what we live for is we live for the fullness of how we are created. And we can experience fullness even if we have a particularly painful aspect to our story.
[00:00:39] Today I'm joined by Evan Marbury therapist, pastor, and author of a new book called Understanding Trauma and Resilience. There's, there's two parts to this conversation. In the first part of our conversation, we talk about the heart behind the book, what trauma really is and how it shows up in people's lives, [00:01:00] and then we talk about.
[00:01:03] Being that empathetic witness that people need and not taking on the, the burden of their journey. It's a very interesting discussion about trauma and how we can help. In the second half of the conversation, we shift into something about the creative process. We talk about what it actually took for Evan to write the book in the middle of his full life, raising kids, working, and then feeling the weight of who am I? Who am I to write this? Will people listen, uh, in dealing with those imposter syndrome type feelings The idea that KE kept coming up over and over again was just get it to exist. You have this gift inside you. It can help people get it, get it into the world. Not perfect, not polished, just real. I think it's perfect for the audience here who has missions inside their hearts that they wanna get out [00:02:00] and it's just another, another expert who.
[00:02:03] Has taken steps to put his gift into the world. if that idea of getting it to exist is inspiring to you, uh, and you've been waiting for the right moment to jump back on board the creative process, this might be the mental shift. You need to finally take that step forward. Remember, I've been, I've created the, uh, the, the Unpaused Playbook.
[00:02:28] It's a simple guide to help you move from getting stuck to taking that next first step. When you download it, you'll get updates for our mission labs that are starting next month. These are just guided spaces where we can begin to build what's been going on in your heart one step at a time. So if you're ready to stop waiting and start moving again, go grab the Unpause playbook @ coursecreationstudio.com/unpause.
[00:03:01] Hello, and welcome back to the Scaling Therapist Podcast. I'm your host, James Marland. This is the show where we help you turn your clinical experience, clinical wisdom, into income. Today I am here with my guest, Evan Marbury and he has I, I met. met him through a another acquaintance and he has a book coming out about trauma and resilience and understanding that, and he just has a story that I thought the listeners would like to know about how he took a passion of his and turned it into something that's gonna grow beyond him, like the book to help other people.
[00:03:38] So Evan, welcome to the show.
[00:03:40] Evan Marbury: Thank you for having me, James. Really appreciate it.
[00:03:44] James Marland: So why don't you just give us a brief introduction about who you are and what you do, and I guess where you're located right now.
[00:03:54] Evan Marbury: Yeah. So really glad to be having this conversation with you and, hopefully it's helpful to your [00:04:00] listeners. I'm in Durham, North Carolina. I've been here since 2018. Wife and three kids. I serve primarily as a pastor in downtown Durham and also as a licensed therapist in Chapel Hill.
[00:04:14] And so give part-time to, to that.
[00:04:18] James Marland: Is it. Urban ministry, like you're in the city
[00:04:22] Evan Marbury: Yes. So yeah, downtown Durham is there's a lot of urban renewal happening, but yeah we're in the heart of the city.
[00:04:28] James Marland: Wonderful. And is it you have your three children, so you're raising them there.
[00:04:32] Evan Marbury: Yes. I have a 8-year-old daughter, a 4-year-old son, and 18 month old son.
[00:04:37] James Marland: Oh busy. Oh.
[00:04:39] Evan Marbury: Yes. Very busy. Lots of energy from all three of them too, so it's hard to keep up, but I do my best.
[00:04:44] James Marland: within this busy time, you know, you're raising your kids, you have you do some therapy practice and you're a pastor. You decided to write a book oh, it's a perfect time for that. So [00:05:00] you the why, tell me why you wrote the book. What, what led you to start? Processing and starting to put down on paper what you were seeing or learning in your work.
[00:05:11] Evan Marbury: Yes. Yeah. Which is kind of funny 'cause I got into the thick of the writing process when I had my third. And so it was sleep deprivation abound there. But I really got serious about writing the book. Maybe about 20 23, 20 24. I was just noticing as I was explaining trauma to my clients or the people in the community that there was a lot of understanding of the word, but not a lot of understanding of the concept.
[00:05:40] And I think,
[00:05:41] James Marland: trauma, like people would just say trauma
[00:05:44] There's, it's a loaded word and it means different things
[00:05:47] People. Right. Okay.
[00:05:48] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:05:49] James Marland: are just saying trauma what did you notice with people using the word trauma?
[00:05:52] Evan Marbury: Yeah, just, I mean, one, I think the word is a, I call it a cultural artifact. I mean, like there's just words and concepts that you raise and you know, if I say [00:06:00] groovy you're thinking of a certain era. I think trauma is cultural era. The train is coming.
[00:06:06] James Marland: Oh, we got a train.
[00:06:07] Evan Marbury: We got a train.
[00:06:08] James Marland: joined the show.
[00:06:11] Evan Marbury: I shoulda did this at home. I was like, where's the.
[00:06:14] James Marland: it's fine. Wait, I, it reminds me of my grandfather. My, my grandfather loved trains. We would go to his house and we'd listen to trains on cassette tape,
[00:06:25] Evan Marbury: Oh
[00:06:25] James Marland: and he had a reel to reel and we would watch train movies and he would actually, he recorded and narrated the book or whatever, and I can
[00:06:37] Evan Marbury: wow.
[00:06:38] James Marland: him, you know, clickety clack down the track. So
[00:06:42] Evan Marbury: love it.
[00:06:43] James Marland: So it reminds me of good times.
[00:06:47] Evan Marbury: it's part of being in the heart of the city for sure. We train's coming through here.
[00:06:51] James Marland: so people were so people were using the word trauma and you
[00:06:53] The lack of understanding or
[00:06:55] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:06:55] James Marland: a different, it meant different things. And it's a cultural artifact. So pick back up pick [00:07:00] back up there.
[00:07:00] Evan Marbury: Yeah. Cultural artifact, you know, if I use the word groovy, that you can, you know, that's from a particular era. I think trauma is one of those words in our culture that, you know, musical artists are using, actors are using, politicians are using, preachers are using, I mean, it's. It's kinda everywhere.
[00:07:13] In one sense. That's great because it's a sense of awareness and sensitivity. I mean, post-traumatic stress disorder wasn't even diagnosable until 1980. And so with, within the aftermath of 40 years of research and understanding, and so we're, it's a fairly new frontier of sorts. And so, uh, I definitely appreciate that there's an awareness, but how people were using it or even how they were identifying with it showed like, oh, I think there's.
[00:07:38] Maybe more clinical help to bring to this. Along with a Christian worldview that I think is helpful as well to keep this concept that is real and needs to be part of our lexicon, but have it right sized. 'Cause what is actually ultimate for us. And I think that was the tipping point for me is there are enough people that I was noticing that trauma was ultimate for them.
[00:07:59] That it got [00:08:00] to dictate how they live their lives. And as therapists, we don't want. The disorders as real as they are to dictate our clients' lives. We want them to live accessing flourishing and fullness and wholeness. And so I really, that was, that's really the main thrust of writing this book of identifying this truly, but also how do we still pursue fullness and dignity living with trauma, not living for our trauma.
[00:08:30] James Marland: Ooh, I like that. Living for our trauma. What was the first part of that?
[00:08:36] Evan Marbury: Being with it kind of like the language of
[00:08:38] James Marland: if someone has cancer you have to learn how to live with cancer. You have to learn how to live with chronic illness. You have to learn to live with the reality of brokenness and struggle. But that doesn't mean it gets to dictate. How we live that we don't make our decisions for that struggle and for that pain.
[00:08:56] We, we live with it as [00:09:00] coming with us. But what we live for is we live for the fullness of how we are created. And we can experience fullness even if we have a particularly painful aspect to our story.
[00:09:11] So that seems more hopeful. Like I the trauma I have doesn't have to determine my future.
[00:09:19] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:09:20] James Marland: instead of I have this trauma it's. It's the story I tell myself, and it means I don't go to Walmart at 5:00 PM or something. You know, there's too many crowds and I had a bad experience in
[00:09:33] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:09:34] James Marland: or, you know, I get nervous in crowds. and I don't want that to happen anymore. So that dictates the choices you make in life.
[00:09:42] Evan Marbury: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:09:44] James Marland: The title of the book is Understanding Trauma and Resilience, A Guide for Counselors, caregivers, and Ministers. wondering if you noticed there was a lack of understanding.
[00:09:54] What are some of the things that people were misunderstanding about trauma that you're gonna, you [00:10:00] noticed.
[00:10:00] Evan Marbury: as the title says, it's aiming at the people that are trying to provide care to the people that are affected by trauma. Not primarily. The trauma affected people. But as I was talking with folks, I get the opportunity to to teach here and there to teach therapists or people in ministry.
[00:10:18] And there are so many severe stories that are out there of recovering from assault and all these things. And people get this tender sacred opportunity. To enter in the most painful parts of their story. And what I was saying, and then continuously over and over again is how overwhelming it is to put words to that.
[00:10:44] Part of the story to identify the reality of it and to have a groundedness to know that to name it is does not mean that it will overtake you. That's often the place of I don't [00:11:00] understand how to help them to move forward. And in the book I use one example of, you know, the woman at the issue. The woman at the, well, excuse me the woman at the well with Jesus.
[00:11:10] And you know how she is showing up at the well, seems to indicate that there's an avoidance, there's a struggle that she's trying to manage and Jesus is calling her out really to. Give her the dignity that she deserves, that it seems that she has lost touch with and the woman of the world.
[00:11:29] Just feels like a really good example of how we can be tempted to live for our trauma instead of with it to live for these really painful experiences that we want to avoid at all costs, whether by awareness or by re-experiencing. And so we move around it. And there is a way to move through it and experience real healing and health.
[00:11:52] And so that's the place of understanding to be with that pain, compassion, you know, compassion means to to [00:12:00] suffer with how to do that in a way that's really effective but is also not a stopping point. To be with someone in their trauma is not the destination. The destination is resilience and fullness and experiencing, you know, true humanity.
[00:12:13] Even with the pain that's there.
[00:12:16] James Marland: I like the hope in there that trauma doesn't always have to impact you for the, for all your behavior for the rest of your life. There is some sort of. And from what I am remembering from the story about the woman in the well, she went to the well, like in the heat of the day, if I
[00:12:32] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:12:32] James Marland: Like she went when nobody else was gonna be there
[00:12:34] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:12:34] James Marland: wanna deal with the trouble of listening to other people. Like it was hiding or avoiding
[00:12:40] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:12:41] James Marland: the what? The scorn or the stigma from other people. And that is such a brilliant illustration for how other pe for people in the church and in the communities are going through their trauma.
[00:12:54] They don't talk about it. They just, it impacts their behavior and what they [00:13:00] do
[00:13:00] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:13:01] James Marland: that are big and small that you don't really realize. Like it's not
[00:13:04] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:13:05] James Marland: you just that's how things are.
[00:13:07] Evan Marbury: Yes. Yes. And it just, it highlights some of the decisions that we make that are so small they can seem insignificant. You know, I'm just going to the well at noon and but when you get curious, like it's like you go to the well at any time of the day is not the issue. The issue is the, well, the driving force of it.
[00:13:27] If the driving force is this pain has dictated my life, it dictated my sense of self, has alienated me from relationships that are really important to me. Therefore, I'm going to the well at noon. Like that is the bigger part of the story that's worth. Calling out and worth bringing love and peace to, and I think that's what Jesus was doing.
[00:13:52] I he didn't have to go to the, well at that time. He didn't have to spark up a conversation. He didn't have to bring up her husbands. He didn't have to do [00:14:00] that. He could have just let things be and let her do these small decisions that seemed insignificant, but were actually very significant to the wounds that she was carrying.
[00:14:08] And he wanted to call her into. More fullness call her into receiving the better water, right, as it were.
[00:14:17] James Marland: Yeah, you the behavior like a lot of people. Who are experiencing trauma. You don't under looking on the outside, you don't understand why they do what they do.
[00:14:28] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:14:29] James Marland: would you go to the well at the hottest part of the day?
[00:14:32] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:14:33] James Marland: do you stay inside, not go out? Why do you, you know, why,
[00:14:37] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:14:37] James Marland: do these things? but you said the behavior is significant to their wounds. And until you get curious about what their wounds are,
[00:14:45] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:14:45] James Marland: gonna really understand what is behind the behavior.
[00:14:49] Evan Marbury: Yeah. Yep.
[00:14:50] James Marland: so that, that makes me go to the second part of the title. This is a Guide for counselors, caregivers, ministers. why did you write to these [00:15:00] people and how does it help them understand the trauma that people are going through?
[00:15:05] Evan Marbury: Yeah, I think, a big part of that is obviously I think therapy is really great and important, and I recommend it. And I know I, I've been in therapy and I think therapists should be in therapy for a whole host of reasons. And I also acknowledge that I have very few encounters with therapists, whether it's not.
[00:15:25] Wait list issues right. That there's the demand for these resources does not match the supply. And I think that is, is what it is. I think therapy is a growth industry. I think the longer we see how the world is playing out, there will be always a need for therapists. That being said, what do we do with the folks that.
[00:15:46] That don't have the same access. And what is the opportunity for the church? What is the opportunity for God's people who are doing life with wounded people? And that is [00:16:00] part of the question I'm seeking to answer. Yes, I want to support therapists in the therapy room. But if we just stop there, there is a whole swath of hurting and wounded people.
[00:16:14] That will not receive this sacred care that I think is, I think, should be accessible regardless of the kind of availability of certain practitioners. And so I do hope that you know, ministers, you know, people in the church or missionaries, all these things, but even if you don't have necessarily a formal title, if you are a caregiver, if you are in relationship with someone and you're trying to walk with them.
[00:16:38] Through wounded parts of their story. I want there to be a sense of groundedness and a sense of I can do this. I, you know, there's a part in the, in my book where I talk about limitations of I, I'm not inviting everyone to be a trauma specialist per se, but there is something that we can do in terms of life.
[00:16:57] Together. And the critical aspect of trauma [00:17:00] recovery is the aloneness that trauma affected people feel. When there is no empathetic witness, the effects of trauma persist and pervade all the more. And so even. One empathetic witness to your pain can really help move forward towards towards healing.
[00:17:19] And so I do want that to be a part of this as well as I don't want people to retraumatize people. I definitely don't want the, you know, with best of intentions for harm to to be the result. And that can be a factor as well. And so this book is to help provide some.
[00:17:35] Some concrete ways to just be with and to be a purposeful presence.
[00:17:40] James Marland: So you, I haven't heard that word before. I, the empathetic witness, maybe I have. It just, it sounds like what is an empathetic witness and. what is an empathetic witness and how do you, what do you do?
[00:17:54] Evan Marbury: Yeah, that's not from me. I, you know, I've taken that from lots of trauma therapists along the way. [00:18:00] Peter Levine Chuck de Gro. in one of the chapters in the book, I pull from the story of the Good Samaritan and how when someone was in the ditch wounded there was a priest, there was a leave.
[00:18:11] I, those was the Samaritan that actually saw and moved towards, and it says, move towards with compassion. And that's what I imagine. When I think about an EM empathetic witness it's not merely seeing that someone is wounded beyond their ability to get out of the ditch, but you're actually moving towards, you're being attentive, you're being responsive, and you're seeking to bring some sense of containment.
[00:18:37] To the wounds, say, I'm, it's not just gonna spill out and and overtake you, but you do have to feel it. We can't avoid this. But I can be with you. And the Good Samaritan was with this person that was wounded was with, in the sense of taking seriously but also in the sense of being a witness.
[00:18:56] And that's a whole other conversation of you, you you can't [00:19:00] carry the wounds for them. It is still their wounds. You have to, at some level, embrace your limitations in their journey. You can't go on the journey for them. You can walk with them, but you can't go uh, for them. uh, what does it mean to be empathetic?
[00:19:14] Clear sense of with and also be a witness, meaning I get to behold your journey and support you in owning your journey.
[00:19:26] James Marland: Yeah. Wonderful. That is great wise advice. You can't own their story. can't own their feelings, you can't own their behavior. And if you do, that is a boundary that's gonna lead to disa. Like breaking that boundary is gonna lead to disaster. So this concept bringing that to light for the people who are going to be exposed to these hurting people
[00:19:47] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:19:48] James Marland: such a necessary step for your own healing, your own strength, I guess.
[00:19:55] They're healing. Like you can't heal for them.
[00:19:58] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:19:59] James Marland: they gotta heal. [00:20:00] So I love the term empathetic witness.
[00:20:03] Evan Marbury: Yeah, and I think it's really challenging 'cause there can be aspects of this work where they seem undone as they're putting words to their experience and even messages that they're believing about themselves, that they are less than human. That they are just the sum total of the worst things have happened to them.
[00:20:24] That they are worthless and you could just see it playing out. Whether they put words to it or you just see it on their countenance, and you know, if you're a compassionate, you want to move towards them and rescue them out of that as quickly as possible. And you don't want to sit there in in the darkness and the pain and also.
[00:20:45] You, you can't rush them.
[00:20:47] James Marland: No.
[00:20:48] Evan Marbury: You can't push them out. They have to take the steps. They have to walk this journey. And the beautiful sacredness of it is that they have felt so alone and this for so [00:21:00] long that they have often felt resigned. But the simple act of you signaling I am with you would be shocked.
[00:21:09] How invigorating that can be to walking the journey. You don't have to add platitudes, you don't have to do quick fixes. You being with them and witnessing doing the work is a critical part of the care. And don't don't underestimate the power of that.
[00:21:28] James Marland: Yeah, don't discount it. Don't underestimate it. Don't take responsibility
[00:21:33] Evan Marbury: Yeah. Yeah.
[00:21:34] James Marland: growth. That right there is probably gonna save a lot of. Frustration and tears the professional or lay, even lay professional there to understand what, what is going on and what is your role.
[00:21:47] Like really
[00:21:48] Evan Marbury: yes. Yes,
[00:21:49] James Marland: role. 'cause you don't, you wanna do like
[00:21:52] Evan Marbury: yes, Wanna do something like
[00:21:54] James Marland: how can I save this person? How can I make it easier for them? How
[00:21:56] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:21:57] James Marland: them? And,
[00:21:58] And that's, that doesn't [00:22:00] sound like you're, that's their role.
[00:22:02] Evan Marbury: No.
[00:22:03] James Marland: Yeah.
[00:22:03] Evan Marbury: No, you can't. I mean, Lord willing that it will get to a place where, you know, a person that you're helping is is really owning their story and they can really see a vision for themselves outside of this, these wounds. But we don't get to decide the timetable on that. Which I think is really challenging for a host of reasons, for therapists in particular because we're trained and we have these certifications and these degrees, and so we can feel this pressure to be an expert in someone else's story, and that can put a pressure on us to have this timetable or this sense of progression.
[00:22:39] Maybe because we wanna feel like we're doing a good job, or maybe it's because we really want to know that we're helping. Or maybe it's because we really just don't wanna see someone. We care about suffering. While all those are legitimate those will persist. That doesn't go away. But you can't, that doesn't allow for a rushing either.[00:23:00]
[00:23:00] A determination of how they take the next step. We have to just be faithful in staying with them while they discern and figure out what is the next step on my healing journey. Now, if you're noticing that them taking steps towards destructive behavior I think you can identify that. But again, if they.
[00:23:20] Turn towards addictive behavior to soothe their wounds. You cannot own their decisions. They still have to own their decisions in that as well, and you have to figure out what does it mean to walk with them through that too.
[00:23:31] James Marland: I hear the train. I was like, he's gonna finish that sentence
[00:23:37] Evan Marbury: promise.
[00:23:37] James Marland: Now
[00:23:38] Evan Marbury: We do not have this many trains on a day ever.
[00:23:43] James Marland: We're lucky. We're lucky that the trains are coming by. It's very
[00:23:48] Evan Marbury: Oh gosh.
[00:23:49] James Marland: Been a really we've talked a lot about the book, who it's for what it is. can we talk about before, before we tell people where they can find the book, [00:24:00] was there one problem or obstacle you overcame that you, that was really a deep struggle for you?
[00:24:07] We're talking logistics business like some sort of is this going to actually get off the ground type of thing that.
[00:24:14] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:24:14] James Marland: He had to fight through, because we all know these types of projects, these books, they don't just
[00:24:21] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:24:21] James Marland: some blood, sweat, and tears. So
[00:24:24] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:24:24] James Marland: something you for that you can share with the listeners?
[00:24:28] Evan Marbury: the headline of it is Overcoming Imposter Syndrome, where I just feel like I'm an imposter to do any of this. who am I,
[00:24:35] James Marland: yeah.
[00:24:35] Evan Marbury: I feel like I can you know, share these kinds of perspectives. But I, I think how the journey progressed for me, it was like I, I. I felt this inside of me as a potential, and I wasn't sure, and I decided I would take the next step of a yes.
[00:24:54] And so the, you know, the next step was finding a literary agent and that literary agent. [00:25:00] Actually put my proposal in front of folks, which putting, make, putting a proposal together was a step as well. And, you know, sample chapters and it didn't actually work out. None of the publishers he put it in front of said yes.
[00:25:12] And I was like, okay, well, maybe it's not gonna work out, but let me try one more. And so I reached out to a friend that knew some publishers and it worked out for. For me to to have a contract with them, I even considered self-publishing which I just decided that for the first book I really wanted to have a publisher.
[00:25:32] But I, I don't think that self-publishing should be off the table. And so for me, just the mentality was I'm gonna take the next step of yes until it becomes. Very clear that it's a no.
[00:25:42] And that can be frustrating 'cause there is setbacks in that and uncertainty in that. But until it's a clear no, and you have this in you and you feel like it's a really good offering, take the next step of Yes.
[00:25:55] And you might discover that it, maybe it's not a book, maybe it's a different kind of [00:26:00] resource. that's helpful. Clarification. But if there is something in you that you feel like is worth offering to the world, and even if you're struggling to believe it's worth offering to the world, which that's again, something I struggled with and still struggle with take the next step and also invite feedback of people that know you and know your.
[00:26:17] Your profession that can really encourage you. But I had a couple folks I reached out to get feedback and, you know, one, one person in particular was like, just get it to exist. That was his encouragement to me because it was such an arduous process. It's just get it to exist. Get in the chair, look at that blank page and get the book to exist.
[00:26:37] It doesn't have to look good on the first round. That's what editing and revision is for. And so that was what I kind of clung to. I'm just gonna get it to exist. And all the questions and struggles I have with it being good enough, I'm gonna wrestle with that on the other side. Right now, I'm just gonna get it to exist and see where we can go from there.
[00:26:55] And so the Lord was very kind and getting it to exist.
[00:26:59] James Marland: [00:27:00] two, two great principles there is done is better than perfect.
[00:27:03] Evan Marbury: Yes.
[00:27:04] James Marland: yeah. You know, get it done. And then the other one is if you're striving for perfection, you're never going to make it to your destination.
[00:27:12] Evan Marbury: Yeah. Yeah. No.
[00:27:13] James Marland: the example there is if I want to drive to the grocery store. have to write down all the steps I have to take, you know, get in the, open the door, sit in the car, put the key in the thing, turn the ignition, put your foot on the
[00:27:26] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:27:27] James Marland: put your foot again, like that's a thousand steps before you've left the driveway.
[00:27:31] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:27:32] James Marland: If you have your destination in mind and you take the next small step forward. You're going to make it much further than like having the perfect plan, writing the perfect chapter. Writing the perfect sentence
[00:27:43] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:27:44] James Marland: like done is better than perfect and just have a vision and move towards that goal.
[00:27:50] That's a brilliant, description of how to get some of this stuff done.
[00:27:56] Evan Marbury: And make room for the disappointment and the frustration that [00:28:00] I feel like sometimes that can feel like, oh this shouldn't happen because it's hard. And it's no it's just, it's not gonna be easy and it is not even necessarily gonna be smooth. But is there a sense of mo forward movement that signals to you this is a worthwhile endeavor?
[00:28:17] And again, that, that's where having people that. Believe in you and encourage you that can give that kind of critical feedback so that you can stay the course because it's so easy to get lost in the thousand steps and be, you know, very paralyzed by fear. And that's legitimate. That fear is it's a feature, not a bug.
[00:28:39] It's, It's something that is just a feature to the process. It doesn't go away, and that's okay. It's something to manage as you continue to take the next risky step.
[00:28:50] James Marland: Great, wonderful words of wisdom and I think a lot of the entrepreneurs listening have had that the fear, you know, the imposter [00:29:00] syndrome
[00:29:00] Evan Marbury: Yeah.
[00:29:01] James Marland: and just knowing, you know, you there, there's hope. You know, you don't have to
[00:29:05] Evan Marbury: yes.
[00:29:05] James Marland: Just keep moving. Walk through the open doors the encouragement from other people. thanks so much for sharing in your lessons. I'm, I feel like there's a, there's another episode in, in that conversation, but we're gonna wrap, wrap it up here. why don't you, can you tell us the name of the book again and where people can find it in any other, you know, any other links or resources you wanna share with people?
[00:29:32] Evan Marbury: Yeah. You can find my book on Amazon. So it's it's not out yet. You can pre-order it. It at least when this recording comes out, it'll be on pre-order at June, 2026. Is when it comes out. You can also go on baker Academics website. I think they have a bit of a discount if you get it straight from them.
[00:29:49] So you can look there. And you can go to my website evan marbury.com. I do a little bit of writing there but I'm not online a whole lot these [00:30:00] days. And. I just appreciate getting these kinds of opportunities. James, I think you help to shape people's imagination for what faithfulness and taking the next step and and putting goodness in the world could look like.
[00:30:14] And I think where I've been helped is making it really bite sized. You really help in making it bite sized and there's just so much online and social media. It's wow, I cannot. Create a home run. It's well, let's figure out how to swing a bat. And you do a really good job of helping people to see this is what it means to swing don't focus on the home run yet.
[00:30:33] James Marland: Yeah. Yeah. you. Thank you. Thanks for that encouraging message. Evan. It was a joy to talk to you and I really I wish you the best and I also people to know, the things you're talking about it's really needed, like the, like with leaders what do I do with these people? How do I help them? You know, what do I say? What's my role? All that is super important. So thank you for your message and being on the show and sharing it with [00:31:00] the listeners.
[00:31:00] Evan Marbury: Yeah, my, my pleasure. Thank you for allowing me to come on.
[00:31:04] James Marland: Okay. Listeners thank you for joining us today. It's now time to go put your mission in motion. We'll see you next time
[00:31:18] as we wrap up the show today, I wanna leave you with one simple thought. You're not the only one that doesn't have it all figured out. In fact, you don't need to have it all figured out to get started. You don't need the perfect plan. You just need to take the next step, see where the next yes is, and get your dream, get your mission to exist. For some of you, that's gonna be a book. For others, it might be a course, a workshop, some paid public speaking, or just getting that idea into the world for the first time.
[00:31:53] If, if it's in you and you're passionate about it, it's worth pursuing. [00:32:00] It's worth taking seriously. You don't have to do it all at once. You don't have to be perfect. Just take those small steps forward. Finally, as we close, I wanna say thank you to our pro-level sponsors of the Scaling Therapist Services [email protected].
[00:32:17] These are the people and companies that help therapists grow and reach their. Full potential. They helped break down growth bottlenecks, and I wanna say thank you to Arc Integrated Fair SaaS, CRM, guest Compliance Consulting, freedom Business Solutions, boss Co. And Profit comes first. I'm really grateful for their support and helping me help more people, put their mission in motion and let their dream live into the world.
[00:32:46] Finally, if today's episode stirred something inside you and you're like. I really need to get this into existence.
[00:32:55] It doesn't have to be perfect. I wanna encourage you to grab the Unpause Playbook. It's a [00:33:00] simple place to begin. It'll ask you some questions to help you find your footing again, and then take that next first step when you download it. You'll also get updates to the Mission Lab, which is starting next month.
[00:33:11] So you don't have to do this alone. You can do it with a group of people. All right. Uh, that's it for today. It's time to face those fears. Take the next step and put your mission in motion. We will see you next time. I.
